Calling All Angels

Calling All Angels
I need you near
to the ground

I miss you dearly
Can you hear me
on the clouds?

Moving

I am moving tomorrow. I am boxing things up tonight. I feel an urgency but I'm not sweatin it. Taking off work early tommorow so the movers can get my big stuff, my couches, my elliptical machine, my bed, my dresser. My new place looks so much more bohemian, laid-back. My place now is one of those ultra modern downtown lofts with the wraparound windows and the thin office carpet, all black and grey and sterile, three floors up. My new place is on the bottom floor of a downtown apartment complex and my sliding glass door opens to a good sized patio with a little three foot wall around it. Leaves gathered up around a little fountain, concrete spot for a grill. I can walk out my back door about ten feet to the pool, pagodas, big outdoor grills. The whole building is built around this inner courtyard and from the street this place looks like one big brown brick complex. Its actually really chill once you get inside, warm, and I've got a good feeling about it. Perfect for where I'm at. I can walk to work in less than 3 minutes. I can focus on whats important. I can relax. Ground floor, feet on the ground, a lot of work, a little play, and a place to chill, while life happens. So it goes...word to Vonnegut.



"Life is a matter of a miracle that is collected over time by moments flabbergasted to be in each others presence." - Speed Levitch

The Hunt

I was young and The Hunt began before I knew it. In time we all got suited up. Game ran wild in the open fields and some men were whipped into a frenzy in the wild. We put up blinds and covered ourselves in scent. Some people had built up their calls. I had a pretty good range of calls myself. Some game was elusive. We followed long trails for days and night looking for signs. While other game seemed almost to present themselves, the thrill of the hunt passed over for quick reward.

Alas every Hunter tires of cold nights, hunkered down, intent on moving on to that next kill. At last satisfied, every old Hunter returns home after the final hunt. No more nights in the field.

Marauding Cave Men

What do women want in a man? What makes a man a man? Biologically at their base core instinct women want a man who protects them. There are big bad tough guys out there and guys that are uh, not so much. I think of myself as in-between even though I am a very sensitive guy at times, I can be just as brutal as any other when a situation merits the use of force. Obviously in this case I am defining "protect" in a very literal and physical way. But we don't live in caves anymore, and while there are admittedly still physical threats in this world the primary sort of protection a woman needs would be more on an economic scale, more an ability to provide than to pummel others with ones bare hands.

I think women at this point in history need a mate that does more than grunts and eats and sleeps and protects the cave from hungry lions and marauding bands of other cave men. They need, aside from the ability to provide, a man who connects with them mentally, that respects them, that has a loving side, and who can interact with them on a long term basis. I think this is just starting to be realized by human beings and I think not too far back in our history women chose men based on a totally wrong set of characteristics. This society no longer values strength as it once did. Perhaps strength of character, strength of intellect. These things certainly, but the ability to lift a large boulder over your head has little use in our society at present.

I think this reasoning fits in quite well with ideas concerning womens suffrage. If women are to be held as equals shouldn't their ideal mate treat them as such and engage them mentally in a way that is mutally stimulating? Shouldn't the male characteristics of understanding and openness be championed moreso than it has been in the past. Do not misunderstand me. I am not rallying for the emergence of the "man in touch with his feminine side" or the "metrosexual man". Men are still men, there is no other side to tap. In fact, I propose (as I have in the past) that there are no sides at all. Women are no more sensitive or emotional than men and vice versa and I believe this to be a long held myth. The effects of testosterone and estrogen on men and women respectively causes the emergence of forced behaviors acted out because of learned societal norms. Men appear inherently closed to social nuance and emotion while women seem to focus on these things, as we've been taught. We perceive this and socially reinforce it and assume that what we see visually is an indication of what is going on mentally but I refuse to belief that my concious mind is somehow more closed to certain facets of thought than any other humans, male or female.

Further, I think we can agree that these pre-conceptions of what makes a man a man, and what a womens role should be, is the basis for chauvinism, which cuts both ways. The image as man as oaf is continually perpetuated in the media but women are no longer attracted by it. Something is changing and I can only hope the result will be progeny of a higher quality and potential, and homes that contain two parents, rather than the prevalent single parent home.

My Six Truths

The rules are as follows:

* link to the person that tagged you : Brran1
* post the rules on your blog
* share six non-important things/habits/quirks about yourself
* tag six random people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs
* let each random person know that they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog

1. I sometimes eat rice with Ketchup.

2. When I watch movies with other people sometimes I watch their reactions to the movie more than I watch the movie itself.

3. I have an ancient calculator called a Monroe 3150 at work. For some reason I am very fond of this calculator. Same thing with my hole punch.

4. I have Sleep Apnea.

5. I pretend to like tea so that people won't think I'm wierd for not liking tea. What is it with tea and everyone liking that shit?

6. I love tats and wish I could have full sleeves but I don't because of my work.

I tag Monica Mingo, Julia Bonham, Dan Drinker, Lola Gets, Tanyetta & Jon

Lord In Heaven...

..please give me the strength to NOT go down to a local dealer and buy this new and amazing vehicle. Give me the strength to NOT want to go 0 to 60 in 4.3 seconds. Oh Lord allow me to ignore that they only want $15,500 for this Can-Am Spyder.



www.youtube.com/watch?v=s40RtrK3lN0

http://www.motorcycle-usa.com/Article_Page.aspx?ArticleID=4456

Bring it, 5 year olds!!!

25

Try this quiz to see how many 5 year olds you could take out!

OK, its about time...

that I housed up. I've been talkin a lot of **** about gettin a house for a long while now but I am really focusing on it now. I have an appointment for pre-approval on the 22nd. I have a realtor and right now I am actively looking at a few places. Mostly 3 bedroom 2 bath places. Here are some pics of the main one I am considering. It's a townhome and is very new and very nice. Here are some pics of the inside...

Leading a Team

The small group of you that have been reading my blog for a little while, lurkers included, might recall that I had completed a leadership program a year or so ago, and had been asked back this year to be a team leader and to guide a team through the program. I have being doing so, and trying my very best at it, for the past 6-7 months now.

Leading a team is both stressful and rewarding. People WILL ge angry at you, especially when you are dealing with their shortcomings and how to correct them. They will be defensive. But they will also be good students, appreciative of your time and concern. When they get done with the program, it doesn't matter, any of those negative things, because they see the change in themselves and you have some great contacts in the organization because you've gone through something extremely stressfull and life-changing with them. I still keep in contact with my classmates from last year.

So soon (in a month or so) I will be flown back to D.C. to take my team through their graduation. I'll get recognition as a teamleader and I'll eat a fine meal somewhere in D.C. and after 3 days of ceremony and pomp and final good byes and final speeches I'll return home.

I'm proud of my team, and what the hell, I'm proud of myself too.

Words...

could never explain how I feel after this weekend with you. Being more confident in this thing just knowing we're on the same page (even if we're not necessarily on the same paragraph).

Like I told you I could write a poem a day. I could say it a million different ways. I could be corny (I often am) and compare us to puzzle pieces, or use references to the sky, the sun, or the moon and compare them to your eyes, your hair, your skin. I could talk about growing old together. I could get frisky.

But when its all said and done, when you get to the brass tax, the bottom line, the last word on the subject, its...pretty straightforward...

YOU MAKE ME HAPPY.

Thanks to Percy Sledge...

for one of the best love songs of all time.



When a man loves a woman
Can't keep his mind on nothin' else
He'd trade the world
For a good thing he's found
If she is bad, he can't see it
She can do no wrong
Turn his back on his best friend
If he puts her down

When a man loves a woman
Spend his very last dime
Trying to hold on to what he needs
He'd give up all his comforts
And sleep out in the rain
If she said that's the way
It ought to be

When a man loves a woman
I give you everything I've got (yeah)
Trying to hold on
To your precious love
Baby please don't treat me bad

When a man loves a woman
Deep down in his soul
She can bring him such misery
If she is playing him for a fool
He's the last one to know
Loving eyes can never see

Yes when a man loves a woman
I now exactly how he feels
'Cause baby, baby, baby
I am a man
When a man loves a woman

Dan Drinker

One of the things about the net that I love is that you are often exposed to things you may have otherwise never gotten a chance to be exposed to. While the net has its share of filth, and things of no significance, sometimes you run across something that so intensely exemplifies the best of this representation of humanity, this collection of things and moments and feelings and people. Recently I ran across a website called www.dandrinker.com . Dan was born with Down Syndrome and his brother Will Drinker has been filming Dan in order to document many of the more significant moments in Dan's life. At first I didn't know what the point of it all was. All one has to do though, is watch, and you'll discover that Dan isn't your average guy with Downs. As his brother said in one of his posts, Dan is a teacher. There's alot to learned from Dan...and basically he is just an awesome fun guy who will say things that are profound in their simplicity. For example he was going on his first date, with Sarah, and his brother asked him why he was so nervous. His response? "She girl. I'm guy." That basically hits the nail on the head.

Absolutely touching stuff.


Dan's First Date With Sarah from WDrinker on Vimeo.



How My Brother Copes With Death from WDrinker on Vimeo.

Annoyed

I've gotten pretty tired of going to Sitemeter.com and looking at who is checking my blog, and seeing that a bunch of people are looking at a really old post I did where I had put in for a job with a different agency than my own, to go to a certain city overseas and I go into the description of that city in detail, and I won't mention the name of the city lest this post get all sorts of ridiculous attention. Needless to say the bulk of the traffic to that post was coming not from .com or .net, or even .org , but from other dot.somethings and various conspicuous agencies emanating out of cities like Arlington and D.C.

So I just went back and deleted that old post. It is no longer available. I figure that should help them out... Slim their search a bit.

I found their repeated viewing of that page annoying.




UPDATE 4/11/08: THESE SHITBAGS ARE STILL TRYING TO GO TO THAT PAGE VIA WHAT CAN ONLY BE A BOOKMARK THEY PUT IN THEIR BROWSER. THE ENTRY PAGE SHOWN ON SITEMETER IS THE OLD ADDRESS FOR THE POST BUT NOW IT TAKES YOU TO THAT ARCHIVED DAY BUT THE POST IS NOW GONE. ORWELL IS ROLLING IN HIS GRAVE.

In the News

I don't usually post about things in the news but Holy Cow have you seen this?!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/04/08/fia-president-refuses-to_n_95578.html

This dude, Max Moseley, President of the Federation Internacionale de Automobile, which organizes all the Formula One Racing, had a sado-masochistic orgy with five hookers dressed in full Nazi regalia. If it was just a rumor it would be bad enough but there is a video tape. According to the article,

"The multi-millionaire son of Sir Oswald, who was a pal of Adolf Hitler, plays a concentration camp commandant in a FIVE-HOUR torture chamber video.
At one point the wrinkled 67-year-old--who publicly likes to give the impression he has put his father's evil legacy behind him--yells "she needs more of ze punishment!" while brandishing a LEATHER STRAP over a brunette's naked bottom."

Seriously?! I mean if you like your butt-whipped, well ok I can deal with that. If for some reason you feel like it is worth the risk to mess around with some uh, er, "ladies of the night", then well, I guess thats your risk to take. But whats with the Nazi Crap?! He's turned on by that? What a freak this dude is. Since release of the tape they have been calling for this guys resignation but he refuses to step down. Needless to say it is a little impressive that this guy "held court" with five hookers for FIVE HOURS. Thats some real chutzpah!

Fatherhood

Being a parent is one of the biggest things in anyones life. One day, if I'm lucky, I'll get to find out about everything that being a Dad entails. Before you're a parent all you can really do is look at how you were raised and how other parents that you know raise their children. You think to yourself, "I'll do this..." or "I would never treat MY kid THAT way." I guess you never know quite how you will be until you are a parent.

My dad, in raising me, focused on learning. It was never so much about sports, or being an actor, or being tough, or any of those things. Its because of my dad that I was reading one book after another through elementary school. That I was reading the classics in middle school, and that I still read avidly today. He is the reason that, as I walk home, and look down at the Iowa soil I can identify most of the rocks I see embedded there, most of it is granite, the reddish, shinier stones are jasper, the shiny bits are shale or quartzite. He is the reason that I know that my internal temp is 98.6 degrees and that if, on my way home, I fell in the Des Moines River, hypothermia would begin shutting my organs down in about 4-6 minutes depending on just how cold that water is. I know why the sky is blue, and I know what a quark is. When learning begins early wisdom follows quickly.

My mom focused on all the nuances of social life. She taught me how to spot disengenousness. How to say what I need to say without saying it. How to take control of a situation. How to be assertive. How to win. These are the things my mom taught me. I guess my mom focused on common sense and a sort of street smarts. Taken altogether it was beneficial.

Being a father would be an amazingly huge undertaking. I can't even imagine but I look forward to finding out. I just want to be the best possible dad and not teach it any of my bad habits or prejudices, but only good things. I want it to be a champion in life and to love life.

One day maybe I'll know what its like.

Great Song

When you're dreaming with a broken heart
The waking up is the hardest part
You roll out of bed and down on your knees
And for a moment you can hardly breathe
Wondering: was she really here?
Is she standing in my room?
No, she's not...
'Cause she's gone gone gone gone gone

When you're dreaming with a broken heart
The giving up is the hardest part
She takes you in with her crying eyes
Then all at once you have to say goodbye
Wondering, could you stay my love?
Will you wake up by my side?
But she can't...
'Cause she's gone gone gone gone gone

Now do I have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Do I have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Do I have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?
Do I have to fall asleep with roses, with roses in my hand?
And would you get them if I did?
No you won't...
'Cause you're gone gone gone gone gone

When you're dreaming with a broken heart
The waking up is the hardest part

If You Were an Ice Cream Cone...

I would buy you on the street from a guy in a van...I would have to carry you home while I ride my bike and make sure you don't fall or my friends will laugh and say, "HAHA, you dropped your metaphorical reference all over the sidewalk", and that would be humiliating....you'd make my hands all sticky and maybe give me brainfreeze...

Did I mention I'd lick you slow til the break of dawn? No? Well then that too. Pretty hot huh? You see thats what I was working up to but I'm shy. Ask Squirmy, she'll tell you...regular shy guy. But now that we're here...reader...you should let me take control of this posting. Yeah thats right. Just sit back, and let me write this mammajamma all night. WHATS THAT? OH you like that huh? I can just keep on typing like this too, sometimes for up to 45 minutes at a time, on a good night...don't ask squirmy about that though. She has a notoriously bad memory.

OK, lets just get to the brass tax. I'M BORED. I've been doing laundry and, ugh, reading. I've fallen asleep listening to John Mayer like 3 times this week. I spent an hour in the Asian market because that was such a huge amount of stimuli. Note to Readers: Avoid snacks that say they are "Prawn" flavored.

Anyway, nothing left to say but I may come back and add to this post later if something comes up